Beyond Words

There are moments when life becomes a picture of grey shades & you feel like you are sinking to unprecedented lows. There are simply no words that can console an aggrieved heart. There is no panacea for the pain that you are faced up with. Every passing hour seems an eternity, let alone days & weeks.

But, as they say “this too shall pass” is indeed true. With time, the hours turned to days, days to weeks, to months & today it has been a full year without you papa. It is very hurtful to lose someone. Though, the intensity of such a feeling lessens with time, Thank God for that. On the flip-side, the pain subsides but the sense of loss remains fresh, perhaps forever.

Also one should avoid the negative thoughts that become frequent visitors in such challenging times. We need to accept that nothing can bring back what we have lost. I know it’s difficult, but ultimately we will have to come to terms with life. People tend to cry a lot, which is normal ,but we should know that the ones who have left us are at a better place & they will not be happy to see in such a sorrowful state. We must try to find solace.

My father..lost in thoughts..on a beach..waiting for the sunrise at Lakshadweep Islands, India..where we had our last family vacation with him in December 2011..He passed away 10 months later………… miss you papa..

He was a typical dad who was always worried about my acads & I was also a typical boy who would find ways to get frequent bashings from dad. So, my relationship with dad has been one of a kind. We both loved each other but we had never shown it on the outside (apart from the time when I was kid).But you can’t really prove in relationships, it has to be felt naturally. I have noticed. Do good and be good, if it has to be felt, it eventually will & for me it did. But it was very late, Dad & I had some of the frankest conversations when he was sick. Those moments are the ones which I savour every time I think of dad & they will always remain fresh in my mind. We talked about everything, a little bit about a whole lot & a whole lot about a little bit. All this while, we were thinking that he’ll be alright, but he was a doctor himself & it was cancer .May be that’s why he spoke freely & I was able to do the same.

I had to leave (I had taken leave from work to be with dad).I have left my parents & gone away to college many times, but I had never felt so deeply while going away from home as this time . Probably because earlier I used to think that it’s just a matter of few months. It was because of those “never before” moments that I spent with dad. I remember while I was taking his leave I burst into tears & sought his forgiveness for all the troubles I had made him go through. I had never cried like this before. That was the last time we spoke face to face.

The strengths of our relationships with anyone can be traced back to two components – Communication and Trust. All I want to say is , try to have a quality time with not just your parents,but every other person who is related to you, try to have that “heart to heart” talk.

Although a bit late, I am glad I was able to do so.

Mumbai .. the city that never sleeps ..

My answer to a question on Quora got me more than 6000 likes (& counting..). you can find it here  or see the same below. Awaiting your thoughts 🙂

Thought I’d post the same here –

A day at Marine drive

Gateway Of India (Reflection)

Gateway of India (Aerial)

Haji Ali

Taj Bombay

Trident Hotel

Powai Lake & Hiranandani

Sea Link

Bombay Aerial view – 1

Bombay Aerial view – 2

Vidhan Bhawan

Victoria Terminus

Overcrowded Locals

Worli Skyline

Bombay City

Juhu Beach Aerial View

Mumbai monsoon

Marine drive – 1

Marine drive – 2

Marine drive – 3

Bombay Stock Exchange

Visarjan (Aerial view)

Visarjan

Govinda Ala Re !

Dharavi Slums

Ghatkopar

Dhobi Ghat

Dabbawalas

British Architecture (Colaba)

Couples at Bandstand – 1

Couples at Bandstand – 2

Bombay Bhelpuri

Kala Khatta at Juhu Beach

Vada Pao & paani kam chai

Delicacies of Ramadhan at Mohammed Ali Road – 1

Delicacies of Ramadhan at Mohammed Ali Road – 2

Sweets at Mohammed Ali Road

Fiat Cabs

Home to almost all superstars of the Indian film industry

Last but not the least-

THIS MAN – India won the cricket world cup in Bombay

The Indian Mother

An Indian Mom comes to visit her son Kumar for dinner…who lives with a girl roommate Sunita. [live-in]

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but notice how pretty Kumar’s, roommate was.She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Kumar and his roommate….

Reading his mom’s thoughts, Kumar volunteered, ‘I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Sunita and I are just roommates.’About a week later, Sunita came to Kumar saying, ‘Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver pickle jar.

You don’t suppose she took it, do you? Kumar said: “Well, I doubt it, but I’ll email her, just to be sure So he sat down and wrote:

Dear Mother,

I’m not saying that you ‘did’ take the pickle jar from my house, I’m not saying that you ‘did not’ take the pickle jar. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love

Kumar

Several days later, Kumar received an email from his Mother which read,

Dear Son:

I’m not saying that you ‘do’ sleep with Sunita, and I’m not saying that you do not sleep with Sunita. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the pickle jar by now under her pillow…

Love

Mom.

Feel Free to comment ..

Sachin Tendulkar : a chunk of genius.

When Mohinder Amarnath got Malcolm Marshall out on the 25th day of June in the year 1983, history was made. After a few Zimbabwean hiccups, Australian demolition and a semi-final win over the england, India was a worthy winner of the prudential world cup. From being underdogs to being champions. Kapil Dev holding the prestigious cup is one of the most cherished pictures to every cricket lover in India. The playing eleven were the established heroes in India for a certain boy named Sachin Tendulkar. Little did this boy know that come 1989, he would be well on his way to becoming a little more than just a hero?  He would be considered a god.

Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar has been and still is one of the most energetic and talented players on most fields. His command on the pitch is one un-matched by any other cricketer alive today.  Be it a twenty-twenty match, an ODI or a test. He has guided India to victory and honour for almost 22 years. Any player with that amount of talent and playing for that long a time could be considered a legend, but not at par with Sachin Tendulkar. Tendlya, as the people in his neighbourhood address him, is a personified level of class, stroke of genius and a true gentleman. There has never been and there will most probably never be a human as strong as this man.

Fighting every type of criticism and rising above his weaknesses is one of the few things you can learn from the master blaster. Consider any other athlete of his popularity in the world. He would either be cheating on his wife, sleeping with waitresses, running over homeless people, doing drugs, having illegitimate contacts et al. Imperfection and controversies are not words ever applicable to this man. He sponsors the education of 200 unfortunate children, has raised funds for cancer patients, helps build shelter for the downtrodden and funds numerous other charity organisations. All this, not as a mere publicity stunt other players pull for popularity, but as a duty towards society.

 

Even around the pitch, he has never liked discussing his uncountable records. The humble man holds records like highest number of international centuries and most number of runs scored along with hundreds of other accolades. Still he never dismisses the fact that the records don’t matter. What matters is that he loves playing the game and will do so until he pleases. Being one of the highest paid athletes in the world, one would expect him to live the good life the snobbish way. Again, the ‘Sharjah ka hero’ opens his bag of surprises and shows the world how simple living is done without being a person people would look upon just because of his standard of living.

Never being involved in a sledge and not even responding to the meanest of comments on the field shows the composure and character the man has groomed throughout his career. “Every day is a new day and you learn new things every day” is what he had said when asked about his experience in sharjah when he made an overwhelming 143 in a desert sandstorm. His team-mates look up to him for advice and so do players from other cricketing nations.

Being involved in a ball-tampering case was the one of the lowest points in this great player’s career. He was accused of tampering the seam of the ball which he later broke out of and convinced the world that it was a misunderstanding. Navjot Singh Siddhu once commented on a talk show regarding this very topic. He had said “Aap hindustaan mein Prime minister ko katghare mein tehra sakte ho, lekin Sachin Tendulkar pe ungli nahi utha sakte”. Such is the belief he has instilled into every cricket lovers heart. Even recently, he showed us why the game is called a gentleman’s game and walked away when the umpire declined that it was out.

The man teaches us all how to work hard, care, rectify mistakes, be determined and dedicated. The man teaches us how to live. The man gives us a reason to respect him and respect others. Limited number of words is simply not enough to explain the gratitude, I, like millions of other Indians have towards this man.

Sachin Tendulkar. Please don’t ever go.

-Sushil Chandekar

The CoLLeGe Candy-part 2

Well, before starting I’d like to apologize my readers about the part—1.Agreed it was very long, but can’t help it, after all its college & some of the experiences are just inarticulate. It’s fun writing about those things. Hope that my readers are satisfied with the reason. Although this one is long too. :-‘)
I had come home after 5 months. Naturally I was treated very well (as if I were some awaited guest) & pampered by my mother.Mom used to prepare the choicest of delicacies for me. The food was just finger licking good (I know it’s the punch line of some food chain) but after the terrible mess experience that is the least I can say.
Apart from all that, a bigger surprise awaited me. My father told us that we were going to the Kolkata & the Andamans.I was ecstatic. It had been ages since we had gone for a nice holiday. I was very excited & a lot of fun was going to be there for sure. It was a cold December morning,We landed at Kolkata.Our relatives were there to receive us. We visited many places in Kolkata. I liked south city mall very much. There was not much in Kolkata for me, it was the “amazing Andamans” that I was waiting for. We spent 3 days in Kolkata & after that we left for Andamans…. After having lunch in the hotel, we went for a sightseeing of Port Blair. The city was small & surrounded by water. The best place in Andaman’s was Havelock Island. The seashore over there was unique. The water was turquoise & crystal clear. I went for snorkelling. Truth be told, it was an experience of lifetime.

We returned to Delhi. A few days were there for college to start. I had bought a lot of stuff in the holidays, mainly tees. Finally the 2nd semester started. There was something new to notice in the class. All the girls were looking prettier(counting only those who were pretty before).It was a good time pass,suddenly,a number of makeovers(in the traditional guy language ,sab “maal” ban ke aayin thhi).The records needed to be updated(sexiest & beautiful girls only, nerds were still the same…(refer to part—1 for more)).It was our physics cycle, I was finding it more interesting than chemistry cycle, although it had difficult subjects. Don’t have much to write about the subjects,oh yes,I didn’t make notebooks for any subject except EG.But I still managed to pass all the papers…thanks to xerox notes of my friends & a BIG thanks to the “akka”(meaning lady in kannada) in the Shiva xerox shop(I still have to pay them 17 bucks).How can I forget about ma’am Sujata.She was the reason that our maths lectures suddenly became interesting. Our classroom seemed like a battle sky, with all the paper planes landing near ma’am Sujata.The best part was when ma’am used to squeal (her voice used to freak out the ear drums) & scold us, she used to say” who throwed the rocket”(believe me after the scolding a few more planes took off to fly the friendly sky of section L).I was once caught. My friend, Vaibhav, aimed at ma’am, but, it crashed on my head (on the first bench).I decided I would do the rest for vaibhav,I threw it towards the board & it landed in her feet. She had seen me. She threatened to cancel all my attendance for the sem,but then bluffer in me never goes down, I just kept on insisting that it was not me.Ma’am didn’t agree, but, my section co-ordinator(NNK sir) was my saviour for the day.

We had EG (Engineering Graphics),it was the most difficult subject for that semester. I was miserable in graphics. All I did in graphics classes was just copy the positions of all arcs & points from Kartik & Akansha(thanks to both of you).only god knew how I was to pass the subject, no ,perhaps one more person Mr. Potty knew (don’t laugh at the name,i know it’s shitty,but,he is only a little lesser than god as far as EG is concerned, I passed because of him only, thank you sir).This was EG.
Time to tell you about the Goan curry…We (myself, my friends Appan & Sanidhya) visited Goa on Republic day holiday.Since it was Goa, we did a lot of bakchodi (i know that you know what it means) apart from the usual.It was another memorable trip that I won’t forget for the rest of my life. I hadn’t informed home, travelled ticketless on train in the general compartment, drove in Goa on a rented maruti, slept on the railway platform, etc(might sound creepy to you, but I had fun).we visited our friends in BITS Goa. It was a nice get together. We had the time of our life on the beaches, looking forward to visiting Goa again.

from left..chaudhry,aamir,appan,sethi...

I had to visit home in the middle of the semester ,there was no particular reason just that we had few half days,many other people were going,and then flight tickets came cheap. It wouldn’t have been possible without the daredevilry of a true friend,Saim.It was Saim bhai who gave proxies for me,had it not been him,I would have got ordi(i.e. repeat the subject during holidays).I don’t know how do I thank you Saim bhai.
My birthday was luckily during the holidays, I was saved from those brutal birthday bumps (man they kick the hell out of you),but that didn’t mean that my birthday treat was also saved. I have a very large friend circle, so I had to give 3 birthday treats in all(man this time they kicked the hell out of my wallet).I enjoyed all the parties, I also apologise to my friends whom I couldn’t invite,I am sorry guys.

It was the last few days that I was to spend in 5th & 6th block, what I now consider the best hostels in MIT. One thing i disliked about these blocks was that there were too many thefts. I had a jeans, few pairs of socks & few jockeys stolen (ya.. they stole those used ones too).But overall, these hostels were very good,I hated them in the beginning,but had adapted really well later on.
This time…
This sem was over very quickly…unlike the first sem when we almost died waiting for it end. Results came..I had done well considering the amount i studied…I had crossed 8.
Some more things can be written, but I have to watch Two and a half Men…

The CoLLeGe Candy-part 1

    The College candy –part 1

16th July 2008,I still remember the date when I first went to college.
Today, it’s the same except that 8 has changed to 9 & with that change a lot of things have changed including me. Change is good & sometimes bad too, I think I will not be willing to lose the few readers of my blog by discussing about changes took place in me. Instead, it would be better to share about the eventful year of my life-the first year of my college life.
I’ll start from the very beginning the day. I left my home for MIT (money PAL hehe),(OK i’ll try stopping those lame jokes, but its difficult you see) & go on till the end of my first year.. Don’t know myself how many parts I will write.
Enough of that shit.
It was 14th July 2008,I had my reservation on rajdhani express. It freaked me out when someone told me that it will arrive at udupi the next day sometime in the evening (it took 30 hours on India’s fastest train). My family members were there to see me off, the train departed & I was at the gate waving at them. It was a very sad moment (this was the first time that I was leaving home),I could see tears in my mother’s eyes.
I was feeling miserable on the train, there were many others going to manipal, but it was the sight of my mother in tears that kept me haunting for the whole journey.I was sinking into myself, I was cursing myself that why didn’t I study harder & got a college in Delhi itself. My eyes ran across the compartment, there was a family & 2 students, both Manipal bound.I was in no mood to talk & was just looking outside as the train caught pace.I fell asleep.

After sometime,the waiter woke me up for giving the lunch, I was full & refused him.I was feeling a sense of responsibility, a kind of burden maybe,I kept thinking about how will I cope up at a completely new place ,so far away from home. On the whole ,the journey was very boring & tiring too.I got down at all major stations & called up home & said just one thing “ammi ,mann nai lag raha zara bhi”(mother,I am not liking this one bit).

    ARRIVAL IN MANIPAL

The next day I got down at udupi.It was raining, I hired an auto to my hostel,5th block.I reached the hostel & went straight to the loo(was a massive piss that one).After that I went to the room allotted to me (room no.218,became famous in the later months,mostly because of LAN gaming courtesy my roomie).I read a few prayers before entering the room & believe me they weren’t answered.My room was small & on top of that I had to share it also.(any freshers reading this,my sincere suggestion to you,forget the home luxury).
I unpacked my things & started arranging them(I’ve always sucked at keeping my room clean,my roomie would know better).It was night time & I was hunting for food as I hadn’t eaten much during the journey.I went to the mess of my hostel,Aditya mess.(freshers forget home food, u’ll have to adapt to this).The food was pathetic.
There were a few guys who were on the train with me.Tushar (who later became famous as “mamaji”) was my first friend in MIT.We explored the place for sometime & then went back to the hostel.
It was a rule that all students must return to their hostels before the perm time,9 p.m.(we kicked ass of this perm thingy later on… as the days passed).The hostel was practically empty that time.Mama ,me & a few other guys were chatting .It was 3 o’clock n I had just had a taste of what hostel life is all about.I went off to sleep.
The next day went quickly, I bought necessities ,a Sim card.The phone number was sexy (has 4 zero’s,easy to remember).

    1st DAY AT COLLEGE

The day had arrived, it was the orientation day for newcomers,my first day in college.I went for a bath & as expected,I had to queue up. I decided that meanwhile I can shave (I hate shaving).I was given a very nice washroom gift by someone who was rushing to the toilet to shit (he shoved me on his way & I was left with a bleeding cheek).I still remember that he said sorry to me & I replied “its O.K”,but that was what I had said,I wanted to say “ sorry ke bachhe ,m**%&(@ , bh(&^$#*” …………(a mention concerning his sis n mum).I had to rush to my room for the cream.
At last, I was ready & went to college.the college building was awesome.We had a small opening ceremony & a series of boring speeches.(the director had to spoil the day ,he told us that our sessional exam was 4 weeks away).I mean we had only reached there…& exam..
Another fear that had my heart pounding was ragging,I was ragged by a few senior girls (all girlfriends of people whom I knew in school).The details of ragging which took place at my school friend’s flat are interesting but it is not the appropriate platform to discuss them.Ragging was fun overall.I enjoyed it very much,specially when I was the one who took it.Yes,since freshers were not acquainted,me & mama became students of 3rd year mechanical.We used to make people stand on chairs & introduce themselves in Hindi.I did this 3-4 times ,but then I stopped,thinking that it can get me beaten black n blue later ,when they find the truth.

    MY CLASS

As the classes started ,the place suddenly became populous.There was a lot of variety…variety of…(all guys know what).My class (section L comp science) had as many as 80 students.In the first week,all I did was look out for sexiest girl (all guys of L secn would know who),beautiful girl (guys of L secn divided),nerds (guys like me of secn L not interested in this category).We had some typical profs ,but one,a swami ji ,an IIT Kanpur passout,who taught us”ethics”.

Days went by.

    HOSTEL

Hostel life was disturbing in the beginning,but all the rough edges were smoothed later on.Gaming was an obsession for so many guys,not me though (we were given laptops by the college).We all used to chat till early mornings about various things like the college, about each other & also about each other’s crushes .A very hilarious moment was when the power supply went off.Each one of us had our views to express about Mr Pabla.We shouted slogans at the top of our voices.I gave a slogan too..but again not the correct platform to tell you in detail.Did I tell you about my roomie?? He’s called Pavan.I told my father over the phone that he was a free ship holder(rank 84 in manipal).My father gave all that inspiring stuff to me & told me to look at pavan for inspiration,But,whenever I look at pavan,its perspiration not inspiration & I am reminded of the demand draft that I submitted as college fees.I think that how life would have been if I was a free ship holder & papa didn’t know that I am having the time of my life with all the money.

    1st SESSIONAL EXAMS

Then came those “player hater” sessionals.I really don’t want to recall that BET exam.I was well versed with all that was taught in the class.I had done most of the things during my entrance preparations.I wanted to have a good start in the subject,I wasted a whole notebook practicing BET.The reason I say waste is because I scored a humiliating 4 out of 20.I had kicked open the hostel door ,the latch had broken & pavan was furious.I don’t want to write more on this one.

This was routine now.We had sessionals every month.Well,I did manage to improve in BET later on.Another thing that took place was that it was the first ever time I had celebrated eid away from my family.It was good,although, I missed home badly.We had a feast at a rich businessman’s house,in the masjid (mosque),at a senior’s place.The very next day we went to jog falls….amazing place.It is said to be the largest waterfall of India.It was difficult trekking there , I had cut my feet & it was bleeding a lot.

The time was running fast now.End semester exams were approaching.The examination time is when we all start to procrastinate our studies,maybe just for some extra sleep…in my case.
The exams went fine,not very good.I believed that I could do better,I had done much better in the past.We all headed home after a long period of 5 months or so.
It was just a great feeling going home.But inside me I had thoughts about this new place, I was thinking that I am not doing well enough over here.I thought that I hadn’t settled as yet & that things were not going the way I wanted them to.
In the holidays,I had a lot of fun at home.My mother was worried to see that I had lost 8 kilos.I used to meet up with my friends almost daily.My result was declared,my GPA 8.12.I celebrated my birthday with some friends.

A big surprise was awaiting me .

More in part—2..

he’s gone

our hearts,with grief they are filled
we cannot believe
your breathe has been still’d
of all your pains u’ve got relieve.

some of us forever may weep
during our lonely sleep
thinking that MJ wont be again ever
and that your music will play on forever.

Michael_Jackson_-_Number_Ones

you gave the treasures of many kind
the moonwalk & wonderful music you leave behind
sad though , but it is true
jacko , no one in the world can matchup with you.

I pray to the one far above
that your soul in peace may rest
& you are the one we all still love
we’ll meet you in eternity as god’s guest.

Aamir
dedicated to the king of pop
MJ ..RIP
on behalf of all fans..

I lost u..

I still remember the first time we met
that u become my friend was all I wanted ,I bet
there was something so different about you
the way you said “hi” & smiled was so new.

and one day I called on your cell
I just wanted to talk forever…
thinking that our friendship would gel
& wouldn’t break ever.

and now,

days have gone since we met
was it all that our friendship could get?
I never wanted you out of my life, I swear
coz for you I still care….

I still meet you in my dreams
lovely was your company for me,now it seems…..

-Aamir

doors of life…….

at many doors…….
i have seen the sunshine,
at many doors…….
i have seen the start of the day.
at many doors……..
i have made a fresh start,
at many doors…..
i have that broken heart.
at many doors…….
i have seen splendour,
at many doors…….
i have seen hunger.
at many doors……..
i had to wait,
at many doors…….
i have become the bait.
at many doors……
i have been led inside,
at many doors……..
my footsteps have died.

at many doors…..

i have lost hope…

but there is always scope……………….

Aamir

MY FRIEND….

o friend!
stand by my side,
in these times of high tide.

drive away all my fears,
and with your caring hand,
wipe from my face,
all the tears.

take me by the hand,
because you are the only one,
throughout this land.

friend,
I need you,
I can’t stand alone,
in my world that has grown so cold,
I need your hand to hold,
as your gentle touch will make me bold.

please…
be my friend
&
hold my hand day by day,
‘coz with your loving hand in mine,
we’ll find the way…………….

-Aamir
(dedicated to all my friends)